The Circle

In the movie there was a ceremony when the four young women were creating a bond between themselves, entering into a partnership. Definitely not a BDSM or D/s or even an M/s partnership but one in which they rely upon one another to gain power to do the magic that they were wanting to do. It strikes me that when I entered into all of my D/s relationships I am looking to enter into them with love and trust being the key parts of them.

This is something that time and again has been the key two things that those relationships had/have. To establish the trust one must first begin with negotiations about what is expected and how the Head of the partnership will proceed.

Contracts are important too, signed or not it lays out the ground rules of what is expected. Normally both parties will negotiate and draft the contract up together. Both are meant to follow the contract in the way the partnership is to work. It doesn’t even need to be for a live in partnership, as you don’t need to be with the partner at all times to trust them but there needs to be trust. Creating a contract is an act of love, it is saying I love the person who I am in contract with and trust them to keep to the terms.

When I was married (and thankfully divorced now) we signed a contract. It was signed in love and trust to abide by the terms. She broke the trust and it meant that the trust was broken. Trust is an integral part of any D/s partnerships. You need to be able to trust your dominant to be able to give them whatever negotiated Power Exchange occurs. In my case I trusted my Mistress to unlock the stockade I was in and listen to my safe words when playing with impact. To unlock my cage when needed.

I am a complex person who has needs, several things. I need insulin to live, food to survive and purpose. I found my purpose within a D/s relationship. It’s not to say that now I am without purpose but it is different now. When you find your purpose you can feel both free and complete.