It’s not supposed to be easy

Learning and living isn’t supposed to be easy, we are supposed to deal with shit and come out of it all and suffer and learn from it and hopefully grow because of what we experienced. We don’t need to go through the trauma of being raped to be affected as your best friend tells their story. We are supposed to be affected by everything that happens to our friends, to us and we are supposed to be able to grow because of it.

Who we choose to become is what really matters. Bad stuff can happen to us and it will, it does happen to each and every one of us. It is our choice to become the person who has been there and done that, seen that, heard that or done that and who we are is yes a product of conscious choices after and during all the bad stuff and after it.

I am not what happened to me

I am

What I choose to become

I just finished watching through all the three seasons and all the episodes of 13 Reasons Why and I am left with a feeling that it really was a trip down memory lane. Yes it was a hard show to watch because a lot of what was presented was a flashback to my own experiences and that of my friends while I was in Highschool. It wasn’t easy then, and I built up armor while in school to protect myself, it was the only way I knew of to survive.

A close friend of mine tore that armor down and helped me craft something else out of that emotional armor. I am still a hard person sometimes but I am allowed to be what I choose to become. I choose to become a support for my friends if I can be. When I can be. I may fail along the way but I will grow and learn because of it.